My whole life I thought I was supposed to be a ‘good example’
or to shine my light brightly so to speak. But I read a blog the other day and
it really hit home to me that we aren’t really supposed to be a good example
for other people. We are called to be ‘real’
and Jesus is to be the example. So here’s
me being real……this whole adoption thing is just plain hard. And I mean to-the-core-hard. This month for me seems to be the worst for some
reason. Many of you have been asking and
I have probably plastered a smile and said “Great” and you notice my blog has
been quiet but it wasn’t me being honest.
Here’s honesty:
*May marked one full year of actively pursuing adoption and
that date for some reason has been hard for me to take in. One full year of more paperwork than you can
imagine. One year of praying. One year of what seems like little progress.
*Our paperwork has been in legalization (in Haiti) since
March which is where they review everything and approve/deny everything we have
done. We cannot move forward until this
is done. Calling all prayer warriors….if
you would join us in praying us forward and that they accept everything that
would be wonderful!
*I know that God
is in total control and that the wait has a purpose. He has a plan for all of this. I know that.
I trust that. I trust Him. But the wait is unbearable some days. To
know that our paperwork is already in country and that our child is already at
an orphanage and yet will live there for probably 1 or 2 years before we can bring
them home breaks my heart.
The months of pain that we will go through will still not
compare to what our child will go through.
This process is just hard all the way around. Honestly….waiting stinks. There I said it. There may be a purpose for it but it still
stinks. I’m just sayin.
Thank you for the "honest" update...still keeping the future Shearer in our prayers.
ReplyDeleteAre you prepared for dealing with reactive attachment disorder and the issues they will have. You really need to plan for this. It is not something to take lightly.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your honest question as I was honest and real in my blog. I can only assume that it comes from love and support as you want us to be prepared for what is to come. As for the future, can anyone truly be 100% ready for a new venture? If you are moving to a new city or have just received a cancer diagnosis….can you ever be ready? I think we can prepare and do all that we can now and pray that God will fill in the gaps as HE always does. As for Todd and I, we have been attending classes both on-line and locally as well as reading just about every book on attachment that we can find. We have a network of adoptive families that we communicate with especially discussing what will happen as they come home. I think we will be as educated as we can be by the time our child comes home. We have already been praying for a long time just for our transition period, for the heart of our child to be ready to join our family, for the hearts of all of our children to bond, for us to bond together as a family and many more. We firmly believe God can bond us together but we are well aware of the difficulties that will come our way.
DeleteOne thing to remember is that we are working with a Christian adoption agency that has high standards for their orphanages. Of course it is not like a family at all, nor is it perfect but it is a loving environment for the children. They do have bonding with their nannies and that bond is then transferred to the parents. Most of the children have bonded with someone and the bond will need to be transferred which is often better and easier for the children than never bonding at all and creating bonds for the first time.
All things considered, it might be one of our hardest times but it will be our greatest also! The heart and love of a child is worth that! God’s got this! HE is bigger than this, His love is deeper than we can imagine and He is able to heal all hearts and hurts. Thank you for loving us enough to question. Will you join us in praying?