Something to show you....

This past weekend our church celebrated Orphan Weekend basically instead of Orphan Sunday like many churches around the country.  It is a time when churches really just want to bring awareness to the plight of vulnerable children around the globe.  By now you know that we went on our first international mission trips in 2009 (Todd) and 2010 (Amy) and our lives were changed.  Instead of stories, take a few minutes to see the places we love.  

This video is from our HeartCry Dinner last Friday night and this is the orphanage that we started going to in '09.  We love these children greatly and God has a great purpose and call for each one of them and for the orphanage in general.  It is an honor just to see what He is doing.  

This is a video from the orphanage where Oberson lives.  They always need volunteers to go and love on babies and play with children! If you are ever thinking of what a mission trip might be like (or just want to see some beautiful children) check this out and pray about what God is calling you to do.

Saturday morning the four of us joined over 250 other people to run in a 5k at our church to raise money for orphans.  It was Travis's first 5k.  Here are the kids at the end of their 5k.  Oh....it was 36 degrees when we started....brrrr!  : )

 

 

Sunday night I had a booth at our ladies event selling jewelry as an adoption fundraiser.  Last year I was there with no idea who we were adopting....this year mom and I were there with all kinds of pictures to show them how they have helped, both last year and this year, to bring Oberson home!  It was a great night!  

We just received this picture yesterday of Oberson and his 2nd birthday party. I guess he wasn't too thrilled about his cupcake at first but then like most children he figured it out.  (They don't get sweets often....maybe his first time?  I don't know!)

October Update

      Although it is a day some may try to play tricks it is all about the treats here....we received our monthly update and new pictures of Oberson today!  According to our update, he is doing well in school and enjoys playing with his friends.  Just like when we were there in March, he still loves the swing and the soccer balls....and often at the same time!  : )  It appears we may have another soccer player in the house someday!  He hasn't recevied his gifts from us yet but this time I took a picture of both Ashley and Travis holding their soccer balls and in their uniforms to show him that they love soccer too.  Oh...I just had the idea of a new picture frame...a picture of each child holding their soccer ball!  I love it! God SO knits us all together doesn't he?  We are all so different yet all fit together perfectly at the same time!  

     Well, here are the new pictures we received today.  Enjoy the treats today on this Fall fun day otherwise known as Halloween.  :)  I'll try to post pictures of our other little treats later tonight.  

Happy Birthday Oberson!

        Tuesday, October 21st was Oberson's 2nd birthday! We didn't want the day to go unnoticed or uncelebrated (is that even a word??) but how do you celebrate for someone that isn't even here yet?
        Todd and I aren't really big birthday people and if you know us well you know we don't do cards or gifts at all for birthdays....except for the children of course!  Then it is a whole different ballgame!  It's not all about the presents but it IS all about the celebration of them!  The kids get a candle for each meal on their special day and it is just a whole day or celebrate how God made them special.
        We wanted nothing less for Oberson!!  We started out singing 'Happy Birthday' at breakfast before they even left for school and then we had a special dinner that night as a family. (And a family dinner on a weeknight means skipping practices, eating late due to long work hours...but it was important and we did it!)  We had kid friendly food (which is important at every birthday party) and a beloved ice-cream cake that said 'Happy Birthday Oberson".  We talked about how much fun it will be to see him with ice cream!   :)  We talked about him and enjoyed a couple prayer times around the table for him.
        It was a nice night to honor him, celebrate him and how special he is, and pray for the day he will come home!

Happy 2nd Birthday Oberson! 

We hope the 3rd one is here with us!  We miss you and love you! 

Psalm 139:14  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made!

Job 33:4 The Spirit of God made me; the breath of the Almighty gave me life. 

August & September

                It’s hard to believe it has been 3 months since I have updated our blog but there really are not that many ways to say the same thing….we still wait.  We haven’t received adoption news but we sure have news on Oberson to share.  : )

                To give you a glimpse of God’s goodness….we snuck away for Labor day to the beach for one last time to relax and to take in the waves before the rush of fall and the cool of winter set in before us.  Our family doesn’t even take a chair the beach and we don’t put a thing in the sand as we spend every moment in the water.  Literally.  We are snorkeling for creatures, digging for something, riding in waves or floating to relax.  It is just who we are.  As we ate lunch one day we were talking about how our trips might be different in the coming years depending on how Oberson likes (or doesn’t like) the water.  My phone beeped for an email and I checked it to find our monthly update from our orphanage.  Believe it or not our update showed they had had pool day at the orphanage and all the kids got to play in little pools.  They wrote how Oberson loved the water!  He enjoyed having water poured over his head and stayed in the water as long as he was allowed.  Isn’t that just like our God to knit our family together even when we aren’t together!  Circumstances and things certainly beyond our control are keeping us apart but God is still working to bind us together and help us be ready for each other.  Will it be easy?  No!  Will it be perfect?  No!  But God is showing us that He hasn’t left us and He won’t leave us!  Together we WILL bring him home…..it will just take longer than we had ever wanted. 

                Our September update brought even more exciting news as we found out that he started preschool!  It is bittersweet. I am SO very excited he is getting the experience, the stimulation, education, interaction (I could go on and on) but as a mama of course I want him home for school.  I want to teach him myself or drive him to school.  I want to put his shoes on and walk him to into school.  But since that isn’t the plan right now I am forever thankful for an amazing orphanage that provides these things for our children!  He is learning to walk in a line, go up and down the stairs, sit in a classroom, learn his colors, play games….oh all the things that preschool teaches!  I just wish I could see him in his classroom.  : )

                We again are blessed with pictures to document the event although we often get the Mr. Serious look.  I’m anxious to see his smiles and hear his belly laugh again! 

                Another blessing that cannot go unmentioned would be his physical development.  Our orphanage blesses us with his measurements each month so we can track his height and weight.  All four of us get the tape measure out and giggle and laugh out loud at how big he is!  Oberson at 23 months was measuring a tad over 3 feet tall!  Yes!  I picture him in my mind as my almost-two year old baby but a baby he is not!  But what is remarkable and what one must remember is where he lives.  It doesn’t escape us that our son lives in Haiti.  He lives in a third world country.  Children die every day of starvation and yet he has grown and thrived under the care of loving caregivers.  THIS is what gets me through the wait. 

                We will always use your prayers as this wait is beyond anything I can explain.  And I’ll be bold and ask you to pray for the children…all three of them!  Ashley and Travis have been patient for 2.5 years now and Oberson is preparing for a huge change (even if he doesn’t know it).  But also pray for his caregivers.  They are holding him when we cannot, teaching him, playing with him and loving on him.  We are thankful he has them. 

  

A few pictures of Ashley & Travis too!  : )

Oh that smooth skin that I just want to kiss!  

There's that smile right behind that block!   :)  Love it!  Love him! 

Thanks for reading friends!  We love you all! 

A Job....

                What is a job? Your job? Do you like your job? How far would you be willing to go for your job? How long are your hours at your job?  Is it vitally important to others?  Good questions?  Let me introduce you to someone…..Madam “M” (for privacy sake)….let me tell you about her job and you can compare it to yours.

                She is a wife and mother to two children (her son is 14 and her daughter is 16).  She leaves home early in the morning to walk and catch a tap-tap.  A tap-tap is a Haitian form of taxi.  It is a truck with a cap on back and many people ride in the back.  You jump in the back and then tap when you are ready to get off and pay according to how far you went.  She rides many tap taps to get through the city and then up the mountain taking over two hours if not more with traffic.  Then she will walk the last way on foot to get to work.  Just to begin her day.  BUT, unlike us, her workday doesn’t end a few hours later.  She will work for the next 96 hours. (That’s 4 days y’all!!!)

                If you haven’t guessed by now Madam M is one of the nannies for our sweet boy!  Just ONE of the nannies.  Toby Oberson has two nannies that care for him specifically and many that oversee his general care.  Each nanny has a certain number of children in their care yet care for all the children.  They work 4 days on and 3 days off and overlap so they always are there for their children (in other words our little guy will always have one of his primary nannies).  They live in the room with the children, sleep there and do everything right there with the children.  It is A.MA.ZING!!!  

                This, of course, doesn’t count for the medical, housekeeping, cooking or administration staff.  We appreciate them so much.  This month our update included pictures of our little guy with his nannies, and told us a little bit about each of them.  We were blessed to meet these women in March so to see them again in a picture with Oberson is wonderful.  He looks happy and healthy and we greatly appreciate all that they do while we cannot. 

                (Did anyone else grasp that reality?  4 days in the same room with all the children! All.the.children. They sleep and eat there too!  How many times have I enjoyed putting my kids to bed and going to my own bedroom…..and shutting the door!  Don’t judge me!  I bet many of you have done it too!!  These women are amazing to me!! Leaving their own families to care for others!  It shows how much they care….and it shows how much a job means to a Haitian!)

Here’s Oberson with his nannies. Haitians do not like their pictures taken so I am not including their pictures since I do not have their permission to share publically.

Happy Father's Day

                If you know Todd, then you know he is a patient and loving man and that was no exception when getting to know our sweet Oberson while in Haiti.  The children are around women more than men so it often takes them longer to open up to men.  Todd was very patient and it didn’t take long for them to become playmates and then cuddlemates.  It seemed only fitting that one of Oberson’s first words was Da-Da. (Like all children we have no idea if he knows what he is really saying...but we'll take it just the same!)  : )

                These three kiddos are blessed to call this man daddy! 

Here’s a video of Oberson saying Da-da for the first time.

                The top floor of the orphanage is the balcony play area for the children, volunteers and parents.  They have swings hanging high in the air so that the other children playing can just walk right underneath.  Oberson seemed most comfortable and spoke the most while in the swing.  The floor brought toys, children and stimulation where the swing was quiet and had eye to eye contact.  It was here that we heard his first words…and became just like every other new parent….crazy!  I was grabbing the camera in between my screams and tears while the other volunteers just laughed at us.  We didn’t care.  It was awesome! It still is! 

Happy Father’s Day!

Closer...

                Three months ago, Todd and I were standing with two other American’s outside the US Embassy in Port au Prince, Haiti on this very day requesting our adoption status be changed and requesting permission to adopt Oberson.  After standing outside for hours, inside for what seemed like forever, answering questions and turning in our paperwork we were then given a document allowing us to continue to the next step.  It gave us three months to complete it.  We left with those precious documents in our folder and as we traveled back to hold our little guy our hearts soared!  The hope of new laws and approved paperwork had us dreaming of bringing him home within months.  Maybe he read our moods, maybe he actually missed us from not being there that morning or it was just a coincidence but he was one happy boy that afternoon which just made the day that much sweeter!  It was a wonderful day

                Fast forward to today:  June 10^th.  It is now three months later and we now have our extension until September 15^th.  (We are being told to expect at least one more extension prior to bringing him home.)  My first reaction is to be like David and to cry, scream and plead with God. (Notice I did not say AT God I said with God.  God knows my heart already. I am not screaming with God in the sense that I am mad at him but I am mad at the system that allows such a slow process.  It is with God because I believe God joins me in crying.  His heart does not like to see families separated.) 

                If I hadn’t stood outside that Embassy three months ago, we wouldn’t be here today.  And if I wasn’t in this particular spot today, then we won’t get to the point to ever bring him home.  Each step leads to the next. 

My motto:  Every day is a day closer to bringing him home! 

                Today I have the memories of where we were three months ago…in Haiti. Today we are three months closer!  I must praise Him in that! 

                Funny story from our Embassy trip:  We had NO idea what to expect at the Embassy but we (being the rule followers that we are) did everything they said.  You cannot take anything with you except the paperwork needed.  No purse, Kleenex, water, phone etc. You are allowed one manila envelope with paperwork inside and no additional paperwork (so pray you have the right stuff).  The driver stayed with all of our personal belongings in the van and our Haitian representative from our orphanage went with us.  At first I wasn’t too concerned….I mean really this is the US Embassy after all right?  If there’s anywhere in the country I should be able to read signs and get around it would be there right? Um, no!

                As the driver pulls over we see people lining the streets and realize we are there!  We climb out only to be pushed to the front of the line.  Ok, I get it...we are the only American’s so since this is the American Embassy we have our own line and we get in first. Ok.  Um…No.  The four of us stood there for probably 2.5 hours while every other Haitian (seemingly) walked past us and we continued to wait our turn.  Our representative went inside to speak for us and came back only when we were allowed to enter.  It appears that Haitians can come and go but Americans cannot.  Odd isn’t it!  It was an odd feeling to be there without any possessions as well as any form of communication and only trust that someone would come back for us at some point.  Ha! 

                Well, our orphanage takes great care of us and our representative came back to usher us in for our appointment.  Past security we all go (it’s pretty easy when you have nothing but a manila envelope).  Oh, did I mention that we were the only rule followers in the group.  Everyone else had purses, snacks, waters, etc? Oh yay! Anyway, we enter the US Embassy to find that all announcements are made in Creole!  Yep!  As we sat there I giggled (probably too loudly) but all I could do was giggle.  The accent was so strong that I didn’t even think I would recognize my own name!  Even if I did recognize it then they tell you what counter to go to (1-30) and I only know Creole # 1-10.  Oh good grief!  Our poor representative couldn’t leave us at all for fear we couldn’t recognize our own names!  Bless her heart! 

                Well, we made it through the wait, the giggles (to which Todd didn’t find funny at all), being told it was our turn (nope didn’t hear our names at all) and answered all of the questions!  Yay!  With help from our representative we were able to get the paperwork, understand it all and then leave with our precious envelope just a little fuller than when we entered.  Whew! 

                That was a tidbit of our Embassy experience.

Changes...

                It has been almost a month since my last post and yet on the official side of things nothing has changed. We still wait for ‘approval’ and for our paperwork to move to the next step.  Yet, we recently received our monthly update picture and one thing is certain….our little guy is changing!  Our paperwork isn’t changing but he is!  He is growing and changing and he is doing it all without us! He needs to come home! 

                Another thing changing would be our house.  We have spent recent days and weeks moving rooms and moving things around to get ready for our little guy to come home.  Travis wants to share a bedroom with Oberson so our largest bedroom will be the boys’ room (which we began working on recently and was formerly our playroom/office/catch-all room).  Travis’s room will become our guest room and the guest room has become our playroom.  Whew!  Did you get all of that?  Right now it equals chaos but we hope it comes together soon.  It was fun for everyone to participate in the work. The kids enjoyed painting and helping get ready.  It is a tangible part that they can do and it feels good to do something plus it will allow them to see something completed. Travis has been chatting about things they will do in the room, Christmas together and other stories of them together in there. 

                We feel time (and possibly 2014) is slipping away…..we are asking for you to join us in prayer!  The process, once we receive our approval, takes approximately 6 months to bring him home….we have yet to receive our approval.  With this being June we are (most likely), losing sight of him coming home in 2014 with each day that passes.  It is a harsh reality that is hitting me hard.  We know that God is in control!  (Psalm 68:6 “God places the lonely in families”) And We know that God’s ways and timing is the best (Ecclesiates 8:6 For there is a time and a way for everything). We also know there is power in prayer!  We are praying him home and would ask you to join us!!  We are praying that any stongholds be broken and that the right person would see our file so that the process can begin to bring him home! (2 Corinithians 10:4 The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world.  On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.)

                As always, we love you all and thank you for your support.  We appreciate your prayers more than we can ever convey!

A pick-me-up....

                The news out of Haiti regarding our adoption has had me quite down lately.  This process is always full of ups and down so I should be used to it by now.  We had the most incredible high when we got to meet our little guy, then the indescribable low of leaving him, the high of anticipation that things might start moving with the adoption and then the current low again that things again have come to a standstill. Currently, we have yet to be approved from our trip and just wait for the government to approve us as his adoptive parents so that we can exit the system and progress through courts to begin the process to bring him home.  (Are you beginning to wonder why I named this the pick-me-up?)

                Today we received our update picture!! Each month we receive a picture and a short update on how he is doing.  Here is our gem for this month.  Oh my heart!  I have cried for almost two hours and would board a plane today if I thought I would be allowed.  One thing that helps my heart is to see his joy.  We have prayed so much for his heart to be guarded.  Through all of the mayhem, slow time frames and frustrations on our end I realize that he doesn’t know any of it.  He is just living life.  May God continue to guard him, protect him, keep him and shelter him until we can bring him home!!

                Oh my goodness, what I wouldn’t do to get my hands on him again! 

The Body of Christ.....

    “So, how are you really doing?”  That’s the most commonly asked question we get.  But what do they mean? Do they really want me to stand there and give them all the details of what I am feeling?  Probably not!  It’s just a polite way to acknowledge that they are concerned about us.  For those of you wondering (especially since I have been pretty quiet lately on the blog front) we are well.  I am able to go out in public and get most things done without falling apart. : ) But let me tell you what did happen and how most of you had an impact whether you knew it or not. 

      The emotional roller coaster is just unbelievable throughout this entire process.  We came home so excited to see Ashley and Travis, yet devastated to leave Oberson in Haiti.  There’s a guilt that comes with seemingly going about your life while your little one is in another country.  All those higher-than-highs and lower-than-lows can lead to one grumpy mama.  I was sleeping little and getting even less accomplished at home in those first few days.  It was a time that I almost couldn’t pray.  I was beyond the words at that moment. It was a fall-at-His-feet type of time and I know my God understood!  He is my Father and I felt like He was holding me in my hardest time.  I could cry out and He understood and I could read of His promises.  My desires didn’t need to be spoken…He knew my heart…He knew my prayer. 

     That first Sunday came and I wanted nothing more than to be in our home worship service with the music and to soak in His promises from our pastor, yet I begged Todd not to go to church.  I didn’t want to see the people.  Todd was shocked!  Weren’t these the very people that have been so supportive? Yes!  But, how could I face them when I could hardly talk, had no answers, and couldn’t put a smile on my face? 

     I learned something on a different level that day.  I experienced the Body of Christ in a new way.  As I walked into church that day I was not greeted with questions or people wanting smiles, instead I was greeted with hugs, friends and tears from people who understood and those that were walking this journey with me.  I sat in church and Sunday School with my husband on one side and friends on the other feeling the full support of our friends.  On that day, I felt the hands, hugs and tears of Christ through my friends.  It was the Body of Christ coming together to love on someone and I was touched in a way I can’t explain.  I pray that I have been that person to someone else over the years and that I will do that for others in the years to come.  I see anew how God intended us to work together and love each other.  The Body of Christ (my friends and family) was better than any therapy session I could have ever had!

     How are we doing now?  Oh we are getting by! I’m trying to plan the nursery and every purchase we will need as soon as possible (nesting of course) while Todd assures me we have plenty of time.   The children are getting excited to help us shop and start to really see things come together and start to talk about estimated timelines.  In other words…we are holding our own. 

     Someone asked me the other day how I could be happy in the midst of all of this.  I was kind of taken aback for a moment.  If you see me with a smile, laughing, giggling or having a great time please know that I am a joyful person.  I do have joy!  I am loved unconditionally, forgiven of my sins, promised a new life forever, redeemed by a loving Savior, and yes I am joyful!!  Am I happy?  Happiness is different than joy.  No, I cannot say that I am happy that my son lives in another country.  I am not happy that he does not know the love of a family yet we long to have him here.  I am not happy that this process is way longer than it ever should be.  Joy in my life and faith in my Heavenly Father to care for my son…..YES!

     Do you ever want to hear a word from God?  This week He spoke to me through a flower in my yard.  Last fall, the kids and I planted daffodils and hyacinths.  With all honesty, I will say that I haven’t done a thing to those bulbs since I planted them.  Nothing.  Nada.  Yet, God watered and took care of them so that 5 months later they produced beautiful blooms!!  They were gorgeous!  I sat there and looked at them and I felt like He was telling me that He is growing up Oberson too!  I don’t need to do anything.  He’s got Oberson in His hands and He’s got it all under control.  Thank you Jesus!

Oh how I miss this little guy!  

Home Sweet Home...

     Aaaahhh……home. If you ever want to change things in your house, get frustrated with aspects of it or just aren’t sure if you like it anymore, I suggest you take a long trip because there is nothing that looks better than your home when you return.  It is comfort and it is wonderful.  Add to that kiddos and family and it is amazing!

     We did arrive home Monday night and enjoyed some precious, precious hours together.  Tuesday dawned very early with Todd leaving on a business trip and the kids having to go to school.  I enjoyed a day visiting with family while unpacking and sorting through mail etc.  

     Although our stay in Haiti was unlike truly living in a 3^rd world since we were spoiled, we did enjoy our 1^st world comforts when we returned.  We enjoyed showers without turning them off in the middle, a bed big enough that we can share, and of course my hairdryer. : )  But it does come with a cost of some guilt because after a trip like that you realize how those things are comfortable not necessary.  They are luxuries for sure. 

     Leaving Oberson was one of the hardest things we have ever done but God is faithful like always.  We have learned to pray specifically and one prayer we have had was for all of our hearts to be guarded from the enemy through our separation and that time would not have meaning for Oberson.  Our time apart may be 8 months but can feel like a week to him in his understanding.  Well, our last day with him we had two hours to share and I was a mess just walking in the door.  I didn’t think I could do it….give him back to his nanny.  The day before he had been cuddly (fell asleep with me) and didn’t want to go back to his nanny.  I didn’t know how I could handle that and prayed over and over for strength.  God gave him the happiest spirit that day and he was full of energy.  He didn’t want to cuddle….he wanted to play.  We spent our last day chasing balls, playing, chasing each other, tickling and just plain having fun together.  When it was time to go, he grabbed my shirt and didn’t want to go to his nanny.  I fell apart.  But by the time I got to the door his nanny called and he was waving.  Comfort.  God gives us what we need.

     For those that have said what we are doing is wrong or questioned why we could do such a thing to a child:  do you think we really wanted to do this?  Do you think any parent would willingly want to leave their baby behind?  Who would do that?  Not us that’s for sure.  This is an inter-county, government process and we do not make the rules.  Do we think that a two week process is in the best interest of a child?  We don’t but they do and we must obey their rules if we want to bring him home. Life is about choices and we can choose to see the negative or celebrate the positive.  We are celebrating the we got to spend two precious, dedicated and uninterrupted weeks with our baby.  We began to learn his personality and abilities and now we can better prepare for his homecoming.  What a blessing!  Will we be pepared?  Haha!  That’s funny!  We’ll try that’s for sure.  We were able to have all 3 kids facetime on our last day and it was precious.  That’s about all I can say about that right now. 

     Your messages, verses, notes, emails and cards mean the world to us.  In our times of anxiousness and worry we knew we had a remnant praying for us.  We could feel it and it is overwhelmingly powerful. 

     To sum it up, we are home but we are not together yet.  Soon…we pray~

It’s beautiful and ugly at the same time….is that possible?

      Here I sit on a balcony on a beautiful sunny afternoon with the island breeze blowing the palm and banana trees all around us.  We can hear the children playing next door, the occasional horn blow, and rooster  but otherwise just the rustling of leaves blowing in the wind. The sun shines in abundance yet it isn’t hot or unbearably humid but comfortable and perfect.  I have a headache and I wondered why?  It seems to be perfect so why would I have a headache?  Could it be that while I sit here I am still surrounded by poverty? Could it be that on this mountain there are countless (countless) people that may not eat dinner tonight? It’s mindblowing. 

     That doesn’t even begin the touch the turmoil going on in my heart.  Oh my heart.  Todd and I began this week more in love with a little boy than I really thought possible.  Yes, we knew he was our son.  But how would we feel when we saw him that first time?  Those first few days?   What would our connection be like?  Let me tell you…..he has captured our hearts!  We have watched him grow and transform right in front of us and it is amazing.  Just these two weeks he has already begun to open up and trust us, he has started walking much better, gotten better with his fine motor skills and started making eye contact and physical contact with us. 

     So where does the ugly part of this story come in?  Being the analytical people that we are (haha) Todd and I had decided that these last few days with Oberson we were going to start to step back.  We were going to be ‘glorified play partners’ if you could call it that.  We wanted the transition for him to be easier.  A two week trip (required by the Haitian government) is new and seems like it could be incredibly hard on the children.  We have watched him come out of his shell and we don’t want to see him retreat back into it again for the next 7-9 months until we can bring him home.  But guess what?  That isn’t what Oberson had in mind!  : )  He has decided that he doesn’t like that plan!  He has opened up, trusted us more, sat in our laps, given us kisses/hugs and started talking all in these last two days.  Oh.My.Goodness!  Be still my soul!  First he started saying Hi and we were the excited new parents taking video and being all crazy.  Then he started giving a high 5.  (yep, same reaction).  Today he started saying ‘da-da’.  (you can only imagine!). 

     What do we do from here?  There’s no telling this sweet boy who has decided to open his heart that we are leaving.  There’s no explaining it to him.  He won’t understand.  Yes we know children are incredibly resilient and that he doesn’t understand time….but we do.  We will know every single day we are apart.  Oh my. 

     We have two hours with him this afternoon (Friday), 3.5 hours with him on Saturday and 1.5 hours with him on Sunday (starting to break down the time) and that will be the end of our time with him until we return to bring him home. 

     I’m starting to pull out the ugly cry every time I drop him off.  It’s not getting better.  The beauty around me isn’t helping.  How many times have I said “my God will carry me though” and “my journey is hard” well yes my journey is hard and I will be waiting but the journey is hard for our son too!  He has no choice and that is hard to accept.  Children in orphanages (even ones getting great care like ours) are still in orphanages.  Many are in situations much worse.  Jesus please take care of these babies when we cannot!!  Pray for us friends….we are surrounded by beauty but it’s getting ugly.   

Pictures

You can tell two things about this post: 

1) My mother contacted me and said she wanted to see pictures!  "Yes mother".  : )

2) I have found a new collage app and I am having fun while bored and yet without wifi.  haha

Hope you like pictures....

Daddy throwing Oberson up in the air....he hated it at first but loves it now.

Hiding his favorite ball in his shirt.  Too funny to watch.  

Learning to ride a car.

Learning to ride on daddy's shoulders.  Again, hated at first but this was his first real smile!!

Cutest little brother ever!  Outfit compliments of Ashley & Travis! Way to go guys!  It fits great!
He is a huge hit every time he wears this outfit!  :)

Ok Ok Ok....after much questioning....and against my better judgement...some HAIR pictures...GASP!

This is how I got ready for church on Sunday morning. Yep...that's me in front of a fan.  As you can imagine....took awhile or this thick hair.  

Tried to tame the mop this day....the stranglers look like I still had my hand in a light socket but I assure you no light sockets nearby.  Oh well.

Here's the side view.....not too bad.

The morning hair starts out super curly and wavy and by afternon it is straight due to humidity I guess.
This picture with him sleeping was right before dinner. 

 Here we are riding in the truck around town!!  Whahoo.  Let me add...this is obviuosly on the very paved road so we were going very fast.  I was holding on too much to take pictures while on the bumpy roads.  : )  Melissa is behind me and she and her husband are the missionaries that run the guest house.  (They are awesome).

Hope you enjoyed our pictures!  

Have a blessed day in the Lord!  

New information on Jessica

(See previous post if you don't know who Jessica is) 

    Have you heard me say that we love our orphanage?  See….they love Jesus and children and to us that is a winning combination!  They do not stand for the injustice of children and aren’t willing to back down to those that mistreat minors.  Today…the American director of our orphanage had the Haitian administrator go and talk with the family about this little girl.  Oh my goodness!  That is called putting the light where there is darkness!   It sounds like the conversation was very positive, they were receptive and they know that future follow-up will occur.  For clarification, we were told today that Jessica is not an actual restavec but a family member and it may have not even been her but her older sister. 

     What really matters is that God knows what goes on behind walls and God will always deliver those that cannot protect themselves.  His children are being mistreated all over the world (even in the US) and someone will pay for each one (in this life or the next).  I am proud that our orphanage will stand up against it and is not afraid to shine the light of Jesus in dark places.  May the blood of Jesus cover the children in that household and may the Holy Spirit convict those that are thinking of hurting His children.  May we do our part to shine the light of Jesus and speak up for children that cannot speak up for themselves.  

The worst moment of my life taught me true love.

      “Restavec” is a Haitian word for child slave.  There are many child slaves in Haiti.  There is a known child slave that lives near the guest house that we are staying at this week. I have not seen her but Todd has and he said she is beautiful.  Her name is Jessica. 

     Last night as we returned home after our Embassy trip and our visit with Oberson, we were just getting out of the car when we heard a noise.  We all stopped and the hair stood up on my neck.  It was nothing like I had ever heard. No movie could capture, no book could describe….the sound of a little girl screaming and the sound of a whip ripping her flesh. Her voice cutting through the air begging them to stop and feet on pavement trying to get away.  I instantly started crying and Todd was looking for a way to jump the wall.  Being outsiders there’s nothing we could do and the man that runs the guest house wasn’t home.  We stopped and prayed a hedge of protection and what we could do for this little girl.  We would be willing to pay for her freedom yet know they would just buy another child and the cycle would continue. 

     After praying (and crying) I have come to realize that as much as this moment has brought me heartache and sounds in my head that I cannot erase…..it has also taught me about true love.  Some people question how Oberson’s birth mother could have given him up for adoption.  How could a mother do such a thing?  We don’t know her situation but life in Haiti isn’t like life in the US.  In a country with over 70% unemployment and those that do work make less than $1 a day it is so hard just to live.  One container of water is almost $1 and that isn’t anything else.  You might work a week (if you have a job) just to get rice.  It is crazy expense.  So to have a child and not be able to feed it would be the worst kind of pain I could imagine.  Her options as a mother would be so hard.  How much did she love him?  She loved him enough to give him a future.  She could have sold him….he is a boy.  He would have made good money for her to be honest.  She could have raised him and sold him to be a slave.  She could have had him work to provide for her.  She could have done a lot of things.  Yet, she loved him enough to give him a better life.  She wanted more for him.  That is a mother.  That is loving someone more than yourself.  That is true love. 

     My worst moment with my worst sound that echoes in my mind reminds me of true love in other people.  Yes, there are always evil people in this world.  There are also still wonderful people in this world that love their babies and wonderful people who care for them (like our orphanage).  God loves us all and is always there to redeem and carry us through.  This was never His plan but He came to love us and adopt us so that we can experience His perfect love also!  

Haiti Q & A (and Hair Update)

     So…what’s life like in Haiti?  I’ll tell ‘ya!  Our orphanage (God’s Littlest Angels a/k/a GLA) is located high up in the mountains so it is very different than any other part of Haiti than we have been in before.  We typically are in Carrefour which is about sea level.  We are about 3600 elevation now. Yesterday we visited the new orphanage being built at Fort Jacques which is at 4500 elevation.  It was breathtaking.

     What is the Guest House Like? It doesn’t seem like Haiti!!! It has 5 main bedrooms all with multiple bunk beds in each room.  Our room has 3 bunk beds.  We have a huge breakfast each morning served at 7:30 sharp.  Today was freshly squeezed orange juice (amazing) with pancakes and fruit (bananas, pineapple, mango, watermelon are served at each meal).  I used a Keurig for our coffee.  We have hot showers but they are very short (water off while you wash, etc).  We do have wifi too.  The best part is the open balcony that has amazing views!!  There are two women that work here and do the dishes after breakfast and then have dinner ready when we return each evening. It is served at 6:00 sharp each night.  They clean all day and do the laundry and then have dinner ready and do the dishes afterwards.  We are spoiled for sure. 

·         Funny story:  I looked at the bunk beds and asked Todd to sleep with me the first night.  He laughed.  I was serious.  I told him I would sleep better with him.  Again, he laughed.  About 4:00 in the morning I hear footsteps and here comes my man…yep, we shared! : )  We don’t share each night but we are on two bottom bunks.  It’s different for sure.   

     What is the best part? That would be when we went to pick Oberson up from the nursery and he got excited to see us, smiled and reached for us!  Pretty awesome!  He is starting to recognize us and get excited to see us.  He will walk away from us and play with his friends and then after a few minutes will turn, see us, smile big, run to us and throw himself into our arms.  The best feeling ever!  Doesn’t happen every time but it is incredible!

      What is the hardest? When we have to take him back to the nursery.  He didn’t want to go back this evening and we watched him get put into his crib and just sit quietly and watch us walk away. It broke my heart. 

      What is the most difficult: Ha!  that would be me trying to be respectful and eat whatever they prepared and yet remain the incredibly picky eater that I am!  Seriously!  Go ahead and laugh!  I haven’t even asked what meat I have been eating because I really didn’t want to know. It has been good.  Last night was pumpkin soup with cabbage, potatoes, carrots and meat.  I ate everything but the cabbage (I dumped it into Todd’s bowl when he went to get more bread….don’t tell him).  Today we had chili (I hate chili) but I added enough cheese and sour cream that it was good. : )  The fruit is amazing so that is awesome!  Breakfast is awesome!  I haven’t eaten goat on this trip….that I know of!  Again….I’m not asking so I don’t know!  The flavors are great but new flavors, new foods and nerves….not a good combo. They have a good mix of American and Haitian food. 

      Now for the hair….dom.dom.dom:  Oh. My. Goodness!  Yeah well, I should have just packed another pair of cute shoes for the waste of space for all my ‘girly get-ready-things”.  No hair dryers actually means no hair dryers.  Hum.  And they don’t allow curling irons or straightening irons either!  Actually when I laughed about the no hair dryers and then tried to make a joke about the curling iron I was quicky told (in a non-laughing manner) that curling irons were not allowed!  With this heat and humidity I have curls I didn’t know I have and frizz that is a conversation starter.  My poof matches the little poof balls they put on the top of the little baby girl’s heads.  Nice.  Oh well. The nannies just look at me and start yapping in Creole so fast.  I wish I knew what they were saying.  : )  (many of you have said my hair looks nice in the pictures….first of all “Thank you”. Secondly, I have the ability to take 500 pictures and pick the 1 that I like.  You may never see the other 499 and my poof ball.  Maybe one day I will post one just to laugh.)

      Have you done anything crazy?  Yes!  They have huge trucks and we rode on the back standing up and just holding on as we drove all around town today.  We were way above the top of the cab of the truck.  It was crazy.  We were holding onto the cage and standing on the seats instead of sitting down.  It was so much easier to stand instead of sitting since the roads were so bumpy.  We just had to duck for wires and branches vs break your tailbone with all the bumps.  Those that have been in Haiti will understand.  My mother would have mortified had she seen me.  I thought it was cool!  On good roads we went pretty darn fast!!  Some people were taking pictures…I was holding on for my life!  Haha!

     My thoughts on Oberson:  Just like any parent, we think he is the cutest and smartest little guy ever.  His life (like every other orphan) is mainly lived in a nursery with a nanny. He has a volunteer that takes him each day to the balcony for individual time/attention for 1 hour a day.  While we are here, he is with us for 6 hours a day.  Right off the bat to say that is a change in his routine is an understatement.  We can already see how much he has changed just in one week…..on SO many levels.  Of course, in the beginning he didn’t know us.  As the hours and days have progressed he has gotten more comfortable with us. He has also learned more things and began to trust us more….in just days!!  He is learning our voices and will turn when he hears us call his name.  He will giggle when we chase him, laugh when we tickle him and listen (half of the time) when we tell him No! : )  What we have found amazing is how he has responded to one on one attention.  He isn’t used to that you can tell.  His time on the balcony has been free play for the most part but with us we are working with him to do things each day.  Each time together we have worked with a new concept/toy and it has been amazing to watch his thought process/development as he must figure it out.  Some he enjoys more than others.  Haha!  He loves balls and loves one we brought more than anything else. He carries it in his hand all the time and cries if he drops it or someone takes it away.

     Trust:  building that trust has been hard of course.  He still has bonded with me in a way he hasn’t with Todd but again that is normal considering all of his nannies are female.  Do I think we are bonded for life?  Of course not!  A bond is a person who can be trusted because they meet a need.  Then after that bond is reinforced over time an attachment is formed.  He comes to both of us now for play, comfort when scared and for most things (bottle, hold hands, etc).  But he is beginning to trust me more and more.  We experienced this yesterday for the first time.  He has fallen asleep on us but not in the traditional way we are used to in America.  He will not face us and cuddle or put a head on a shoulder.  He is not used to a comfort hold like that.  He wouldn’t let himself relax or anyone to get that close.  Yesterday…he did!  He snuggled with me and went to sleep in my arms!  It was a big step and showed that he is really beginning to bring down those walls and trust us on new levels. 

     What will happen now?  On Friday we had our first of two interviews.  Monday we will go to the Embassy and we will have our second interview sometime this coming week.  The rest of the week will be filled with time with Oberson.  Our sermon today was from none other than a good ‘ole GA boy Andy Stanley and was on worry (a video of course).  It spoke so much to me as I have been pretty worried about leaving Oberson.  I have seen his life, I see where he spends his days and I have no desire to leave him here.  I must trust God, trust His plan and not worry about tomorrow.  I ask you to pray for us.  Pray that we have a good last week together and that God would protect Oberson’s heart.  As he begins to trust us we need to protect him as we leave.  May our Lord hold him when we cannot and protect his heart. 

Daddy Time...

     Yesterday was a full day and we went to bed exhausted but with full hearts!  We spent almost the entire day with Oberson and then ended our day talking with Ashley and Travis via Facetime…..our hearts are full!  I was too tired to update. I wrote this blog this morning but didn’t get it uploaded before it was time to leave.  Now Oberson is with his nanny for lunch/napso I will update quickly to give you an idea of what happened yesterday and share some prayer requests for our prayer warriors out there! (Thank you to those praying….we need them and we feel them!  This is emotional which is exhausting and your prayers are greatly appreciated!)

     The orphanage is filled with women so Oberson has not had a lot of experience with men, especially white men.  It is common (and we expected) that the bonding with daddy would be more difficult.  It has proven to be the case with us.  Yesterday we began to concentrate on forming that relationship.  Todd has the patience needed and has been amazing with Oberson.  He just played and played with him, being very consistent yet not pushing throughout the day.  We took time away from all of the other children and went to a room with just the three of us for awhile.  Oberson let Todd hold him and we read books and played with toys.  He was able to see me yet allowed Todd to hold him (huge).  For the first part of the day he would come back to me every so often for reassurance but by the end of the day they would play and I could remain out of the way.  Todd still cannot kiss or hug him though as he pushes back and gets upset. It will come.  It is only day two.  Todd is longing to hold him though and aches to kiss him like I can.  That would be one of our main prayer wishes that you pray for their bond. 

     It was a wonderful day!  We played on the balcony for hours.  We went for a long walk on the roads surrounding the orphanage.  We pushed him in the swings, read books, played balls (his favorite) and cars.  This morning we have had a blow-up bouncy house out and it was a blast!  We had lots of fun and then he fell asleep on Todd!  Yay!  Progress!  God is SO good!    

     Please continue to pray for all of our bonding and for Ashley and Travis.  They are doing well but seemed a little on the sad side last night.  It’s getting real and we have a long time to go yet.  Thank you so much friends!  Your support is overwhelming!! We are overwhelmed….this whole process is amazing yet overwhelming too!  Love you all!

     I’ll leave you with some pictures so we can go see our SON!  : )

Don't you love the view from the balcony! 

The beginnings….Day 1

           My heart is full.  I hardly know how to put what we experienced today into words but I know I must try as so many of you have sent messages asking how it went.  Thank you for the prayers and love!

           This afternoon we walked into the balcony of God’s Littlest Angels to see our son.  He was sitting on a bench just like a big boy except the look on his face showed confusion and apprehension.  This was a room usually filled with friends and laughter and now it was quiet with strangers walking in the door.  He sat in the cutest outfit and looked so adorable that I wanted to grab him immediately but refrained so I didn’t scare him.  I sat in front of him and started to talk to him.  Of course all the Creole I practiced was lost (he speaks no English) which means we didn’t understand a word each other was saying.  But God was knitting our hearts together. 

           We got out some toys and he loved the balls we brought.  The cars aren’t too bad either but the balls are definitely the favorite.  He never let the one go the rest of the day.  He warmed up to me the most but I think he is more familiar with women than men.  After playing with ‘daddy’ for awhile he warmed up to him also.  We had about a half hour of time alone together before other volunteers and children joined us for play.  It was a chance to see him interact with other children too. 

           All in all for our first meeting it went very well.  He never cried or anything like that. He allowed us to hold and carry him.  We tickled, chased, played ball and just played toys. I changed his diaper and did all the mom things for awhile. 

           And I didn’t even cry until I had to return him to the nursery!  That’s pretty darn good for me!  : )  Then I boo-hoo’d!  I’m exhausted now but already counting the hours until we can get him tomorrow.  We’ll see if he comes to us in the morning. 

          Here are a few pics from today.